Oh That's So Ironic

I got an email today from Norton Anitvirus titled: How To Get Rid Of Your Junk Mail!. The irony of the situation was unavoidable as I followed the instructions to unsubscribe myself from future mailings.

Again, I'm sitting in an airport, so again I fire up the ol' blogger. It's too early to call anyone, and there's nothing interesting on facebook. Admittedly, I feel pretty self-conscious right now sitting here on my little netbook, blogging away with my noise-reduction headphones, sipping my Starbucks vanilla late, being all trendy and hip. If I had a Timbuk2 satchel, square-framed glasses, and some classic Russian literature next to me (with post-it page reminders), you would not be in the wrong to slap me upside the head, sending my headphones flipping through the air in perfectly ironic little twirls.

But I don't. So please don't hit me.

In fact, despite my hipster-guise, I am most likely going to be quite the popular guy at Delta gate #20. Because I am a ticket-holding passenger in an airport one day after a flight-cancelling snowstorm. That means if I am willing to change my plans, I stand to make a nice little profit on my ticket. I brought sidewalk chalk and a poster-board with me for just this occasion. Next to me sits a sign that says "Please have all offers in written form and signed", and the chalk outlines the a switchback line. I await the throngs of desperate wealthy business travelers who will sign away the keys to their BMW to make that all-important meeting in Minneapolis today (I only accept 2006 models and later, unless proper and present warranty information is disclosed). So please, form an orderly single-file line. No personal checks.

And please stop knocking my headphones off. They are quite expensive.