Conpsiracy Theorist

In Santa Monica, my roommate Tassa would often watch CNN. And during the eve of the election, he would, more often then not, get worked up about what he was watching. Here is a snippet of a completely run-of-the-mill conversation that might have conspired in our living room:

Tassa: You ever wonder about Palin? I mean REALLY WONDER about Palin, bru?

Ollie: In what way.

Tassa: I mean like, look at this woman, this woman who supposedly was picked at random to be in this presidential campaign...

Ollie: Well it wasn't random, I mean, there are a lot of decisions that went-

Tassa: No, but I mean how in the world could they have found someone way up in bum-f@ck Alaska! I mean if you really THINK about it bru... there's something else there. Something else BEHIND the curtains.

Ollie: O.K.

Tassa: You see what I'm saying - I mean I watch this 'woman' on TV all the time and there's something in her smile that -YOU know what I'm talking about.

Ollie: I think you're going to have to spell it out for me.

Tassa: Bru, you can't tell me that you don't think Palin has been part of some nefarious deeds. Deeds that may have brought her to her place right now. Next to that wrinkly old man. I'm talking blackmail.

Ollie: Oh, so Palin blackmailed McCain for that position.

Tassa: Yeah, or, you know something like that. I just have this feeling in my gut bru, you know, whenever she gives that f@cking little wink of hers, that wink that makes me want to kill someone. You just know that she's done something to get there.

Ollie: Can't really say that I've thought about that... but... yeah, you never know I guess.

Tassa: But can't you see that?

Ollie: I don't like her wink, I guess.

Tassa: Exactly. And have you ever wondered WHY?

Ollie: It's condescending.

Tassa: No, it's the wink of a conspirator. She's doing it just to piss off McCain.

Ollie: I don't think I can agree with that.

Tassa: I'm telling you bru, that's what it is.  I've got this GUT instinct. I just FEEL it. Just you see, in fifty or sixty years, it's all going to come out. I'm telling  you. I'm TELLING you.

Ollie: Yeah, we'll see I guess.

Tassa: Oh man. What a bitch.